Saturday, 30 April 2016

The Awakening

Demon Lilith begins to wake
There comes a point when a road has no more twists, turns or forks. You meet a still place. A glade, with a heavy quietness that unnerves you.

As the years go by, the road can feel gradually steeper. You barely notice. The mountain is all there is, all there was. To sit, in the sun, or gently stroll is a memory. A myth. That sense of slight hovering unease, deep discontent, rising fatigue, of deep, under-the-skin irritation, grows. So deep that to scratch is out of the question. It grows into a not inconsiderable weight, where happiness becomes an illusive forgotten song.

Finally, having felt that I am in this very place, I sit down and since I can't really ignore it any more, I ponder the inevitable decision.
Look towards the horizon and what do I see.

Nothing.

It had been a while since I had really thought about my future and whenever I did, I didn't think about it for long. I would jump away from it, and back into my routine, my comfy hole. Surrounded by my creature comforts, I had not realised that in the corner of the room, one of my creatures had grown quite large.

A dark shadowy figure, caught by the flickering orange warm flames of the crackling fire, was catching the light with velvet dampening highlights and I had not looked over at that corner for a while. This time, the beady eye watching me back could not be ignored so easily.

Lilith needed attention. She was not going to take no for an answer. Her usual contendedness had lately grown with her size. She was shedding her skin, no longer suitable for the armoured scales and ridges, and claws that she would need.

"Give it up" came her gravelly, soft and slightly chilling suggestion.

Caught with the image of doing just that, I saw only the precipice to which I was clinging, slipping slowly towards the sheer drop. Only gossamer thread wrapped me around Lilith and the secure roots of my predictable, safe world that I had built. If I let go, what would happen? My fear told me quite clearly. Drop, into that groundless expanse.

"I can't" I said. "I'll fall."

"Of course you will" Lilith grinned, with a glint. "That's why I'm here."

And Lilith slowly arose, leathery wings sprouting and unfurling, tearing apart the threads of my life, and with a breath of fire burned my hands upon the roots, until I let go in anguish. And down, down, I fell.

Swooping, Lilith caught me on her back, and into the sunrise, flew.